Torn Apart
by WickedPirate79
Summary: A Pirate Queen story. Grace O'Malley returned home after being released by the Queen... but she was without her Tiernan and nightmares haunted her...


**Disclaimer:** The characters are not mine. I am simply borrowing them for my own entertainment. And Grania (Grace) O'Malley was an amazing woman in history.

**Note:** _The Pirate Queen_ was an unbelievably beautiful and powerful musical from Boublil and Schonberg. I miss it terribly and this is just another way for me to stay connected to this amazing story. This is basically a one-shot, if there is a decent amount of interest, I may develop the story further. My story simply takes place after Tiernan goes to England and asks the Queen to take him in place of Grace so that she may return home to Ireland to be with her son. Grace returns home and the story begins….

**Torn Apart**

Chapter 1

Grace has not been able to sleep for weeks since being released from the English and returning to Ireland. Every night, reliving in dreams the moment of seeing Tiernan imprisoned, in place of her.

Once again she is awakened from the nightmare that haunts her. Always reaching out to Tiernan, but never quite there. Broken out in a cold sweat, she moves to sit on the side of the bed. Leaning forward, she cradles her face in her hands and begins to weep quietly. Needing to be strong for her people and her son, it is only in the small times like this, where she can release the pain and sorrow she feels within. Alone. Without her soul mate… Without Tiernan…

After a time, Grace slowly gets to her feet and heads over to the water basin to wash her face. The cold water feels refreshing as she splashes it on her face. She takes a deep breath and tries to calm herself, bringing her fully back from the vivid nightmare.

Knowledge returning to her, that her son is safe downstairs in his chambers she grabs a blanket and wraps it around herself. Just as she is opening her door she remembers something. Returning to her bed, she reaches under her pillow and grabs the folded piece of paper that is there and clutches it to her heart before heading downstairs to Eoin's room.

Opening the door slowly, she walks in to the little boy's room and stands just inside the doorway. _'Our lives have changed so much since last I saw you and held you in my arms my little one. And now your life has been turned upside down once again.'_ Grace walks toward where the wee lad is sleeping and quietly sits down next to him. Trying not to disturb him, she softly whispers to him, "though we have been apart my angel, you have been in my heart always." Moving a piece of hair out of his face, she leans over and kisses him softly on the forehead. "Sleep my sweet angel. You are an answered prayer and my hope in this darkness right now. I love you so much," she whispers in the boy's ear before getting up. She pulls his blanket up and tucks him in. Leaning down one last time she kisses him goodnight.

Securing her blanket tighter, she walks across to the chair in the corner of the room. Sitting down, she opens the folded paper and reads the words she has read a million times over.

_A ghr__á mo chroí… (trans. 'love of my heart')_

_If you are reading this, then you know what I have done._

_And I know you, trying to find a way this could have been different. But I would have done this a million times over. You and Eoin are my world and without you I am not my whole self. Knowing I have reunited you with him gives me more joy and hope than you can know. I have told him of you every night of his life and how brave his mother is. Those were his favorite stories when he could not sleep._

_You would never tell anyone but I know you are afraid my love. Just know he is too. You both need each other and it's been too long. Eoin needs his mother; he needs you. Please understand why I've done this and forgive me the lengths of which I've gone. _

_I surrender all to you…my Grace, my heart._

_Tiernan_

Tears sting her eyes and fall down her already tear stained cheeks. She glances over to her sleeping son, trying to focus on the present and not be overtaken by the nightmare awaiting her in sleep.

After a few moments she rises and walks out of the room heading down to the living quarters. She heads to the desk in the room. Lighting the candle, she sits down and grabs a parchment and ink. She begins to write a letter she knows cannot be delivered.

_My Tiernan_

_How can you ask me to forgive you when you have done nothing needing forgiveness? I am the one who needs forgiveness, for all I have put you through...but yet you are always there, unconditionally. You sacrificed your freedom for my son and myself. My heart broke into a million pieces seeing you thrown in the cell in place of me._

_You are more than I deserve, I feel at times. Apparently I have done something in my life that I am constantly to be torn apart from you. I can never seem to sustain happiness but for a brief moment. I hold on to those moments now, for those memories are what get me through each day. Eoin misses you terribly. And I…miss you more than any words can express._

_You are my heart and without you I feel lost and incomplete._

_Your heart (Grace)_

A single tear falls on the parchment just below her name, as though finalizing the letter with an emotional seal.

She places the ink back and blows out the candle. Standing up she grabs the folded paper of Tiernan's and heads back up to Eoin's chambers. Once inside she goes to the chair and curls up in it before finally letting the darkness of sleep take over.


End file.
